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Not long ago we were telling someone about our process of uprooting and moving to another continent. “Wow”, she said, “you are so brave, either that or maybe you’re just crazy!” Crazy most certainly, but we definitely are not alone. More and more of us “mid-lifers” refuse to be “lifers” sentenced to the same old, same old. Baby Boomers have always been on the cutting edge, just think of the sixties! A client and I had a good laugh this morning as we shared stories of way too short mini-skirts and white go-go boots! We agreed, we looked fabulous! So why would we be surprised that so many mid-lifers are reimagining and reinventing their lives in new, unusual and amazing ways? These are just some of the brilliant ‘boomer’ clients we know who have been willing to rearrange their lives to follow their desires and actually make their dreams happen…
If you are not planning to slip quietly into mid-life here are a few things to consider… It’s Big! Everything you ever thought you planned for your life is up in the air. When you decide mid-life to reinvent your entire life it’s like experiencing your own personal earthquake. It starts out with a few rumbles then builds in intensity until you feel the earth move under your feet (hmm, think I hear a song). One minute you feel absolutely sure of what you are doing and the next you question your sanity…and that’s completely normal! 4a.m. fears are the deadliest. These are the times when you wake in a cold sweat (which is a pleasant change from waking in a night sweat, you know what I mean) questionning every decision you have made up to that point. Best advice, go back to sleep because by 6am you will once again believe in your dream. You cannot, absolutely cannot, know every detail of the plan. Of course we believe in planning, those of you who work with us know we advocate planning, but realistically there are times when you have to act before you know all the elements of the plan…but then that is in essence what an adventure is all about…trying something new or leaping into the unknown. That’s why we always call it our “leap of faith” and it opens up the door to endless possibilities and opportunities. Worrying about what others think just drives you crazy. Frankly, and somewhat surprisingly, the majority of people who have heard of our adventure have been astoundingly supportive, encouraging, and downright excited for us. It’s been wonderful to bathe in their enthusiasm. Of course there will always be the ‘nay sayers, the what iffers, the yeah butters’ and you have to choose to let them discourage you or not…NOT! I feel sorry for them, because I do believe that their negativity comes directly from their fear or their envy. Either way…not my problem! If I wanted doubts I could come up with them all on my own! (see the 4am note). Just want to say to them, “get your own adventure, you ARE capable of it”. So whether you are right at the starting line of mid-life (hate to tell you but in terms of research we consider this 30!) or approaching the other end of the continuum but refusing to head for the porch, here is a little bit of hard earned wisdom. Life does not stay the same. So why not…love that question…why not dream ahead, plan ahead and then join the revolution of those who refuse to surrender? Anybody can reinvent their lives, but first you have to reimagine it! Here’s how to start…
Learn to let go – When faced with huge change, even anticipated and exciting change, we tend to hang on to what we have and what we know. Climbers know only too well, sometimes you have to let go of your handhold and swing free before you can progress. The trick is focusing on what you are reaching for, not letting go of. It is difficult and takes numerous reminders to “not look down”. But…when you get this concept you are free to reach for the stars! Be open to your dreams – Imagination is like breathing to children. When you were a kid you used to dream. When we get older we tend to put aside our dreams, calling them unrealistic, naiive, or plain old silly. Well, maybe it is time to drag them out and dust them off, or maybe it’s high time to find a few new ones. It’s all about being open to possibilities, to not be afraid to envision or imagine what life could be like if…What could be a better time than mid-life for that? You have the experience, you have the wisdom, and you definitely have the courage.
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